She takes me away to that special place.

For one of my journal prompts, I was instructed to take a moment to watch someone I’m grateful for and focus on them for 10 minutes. Nothing else. No eating or drinking. No television on. Nothing but that individual. If possible, I wasn’t supposed to interact with them, instead just observe them without them noticing. I believe the point was to just be with the person fully and fully appreciate them in that moment. For this writing assignment, I’m supposed to write about someone I admire. I immediately recalled the admiration I felt for that individual while I observed due to the journal prompt.

My daughter is two years old. While I wish I could give her my attention very moment of the day, returning to school has changed our relationship. As a stay at home mom for the year of her life, she depended on me for everything. Since she’s started day care I’ve noticed a growth in her independence. Of course, this is also related to her growth development and the experiences she’s lived. I knew she was growing, mentally and physically, but it wasn’t until I took that break and focused on her that I realize how much she’s changed.

I admire her courage and her persistence in trying in new things almost every day. She is fearless in the completion of tasks that may seem simple to an adult, but are VERY complex for her. She loves unconditionally. Whether it be a bug she’s noticed or a dog being walked, a kid at day care or an adult in her life. She treats everything with kindness upon introduction to it, never making a negative judgement on something the first time she sees it. This vulnerability and openness to experience and open her arms to new things is so admirable and I find myself jealous of how natural it comes to her. She has an abundance of emotions she doesn’t fully understand and asks for help when she needs help processing them. Imagine an adult walking up to you and saying “I feel like overwhelming anger about this and I don’t know how to fix it or work through it.” That just doesn’t happen anymore.

I hope to nurture this self-awareness in a way it isn’t normally done in order to keep it alive. This world needs compassion and kindness. I also hope to continue her lessons on impermanence so she may continue processing the emotions that come with each and every realization that everything changes everyday.

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